Teens+SummerMoviesIt’s August. Summer is winding down. Your teens have worn you down.

Back in June, you had great resolve that there would be more moving and less movies. But now you feel yourself caving. Your teens say they’re bored. They say they worked hard flipping burgers. Or they played hard flipping off the diving board. And now they want to sink deep into the sofa and into a good movie.

“Please mom, can we watch a movie?”

Maybe a few years ago it would have been easier to say no. Back then, saying yes to a movie would involve driving to the red box, or walking to the mailbox for the red envelope. But today, all you have to do is point a magic wand toward the big black box on your wall, and… voila! Instant showtime.

I get you, Mom. I feel your dwindling resolve, Dad. I understand your caving-in parenting style. It’s all good. That’s what August is for. Soon you’ll be back to blowing your 6 a.m. whistle and barking out orders for the lunch-making assembly line. For now, I think it’s okay to let your kids watch some movies.

But before you say yes, here are 8 tips for making the most of teen movie-watching: [tweetthis display_mode=”buttonlink”]8 tips for making the most of teen movie-watching[/tweetthis]

    1. Set Limits. At our house, we don’t watch movies till after dark. That’s our rule. To help enforce it, we don’t allow the kids to pull the shades. (Heh, heh. Aren’t we tricky.) There are rare exceptions, but this helps keep movie watching contained to a certain time of day. If you’re better at policing things than I am, you might want to set limits on movies/week or minutes/day.
    2. Assign the Research. Many times, I haven’t even heard of the movie my kids are asking to watch. I used to get grumpy about the time it took for me to research a particular movie, but now I’ve offloaded the researching to my teens. They bear the burden of proof. They look up a review and give me a report on the movie’s “questionable content”. Our family especially likes Dove.org, which offers a little bar graph that shows exactly which content (including a tally of occurrences) is “over the line”.If you prefer to skip the research and selecting process, and let the experts do it for you, consider the Dove Channel—a family-friendly version of Netflix. Right now, you can get a full year for only $24.99! Use the code: DOVESCHOOL24.

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  1. Use filters. If the show my teens suggest has off limits material (many of them do), we use filters. Vid Angel allows you to stream movies and set each individual filter, for $1 per movie. Clear Play offers streaming or DVD filtering with a monthly subscription.
  2. No teen left behind. At least not in front of a screen. We made a new household policy this summer, that nobody watches TV or movies alone. It’s because temptation is greater when you’re alone—to watch things you shouldn’t, to stay up too late, to binge watch when you should go to bed… My husband and I have adopted this rule as parents, too, which has helped me get to bed on time!
  3. No phones. My teens came up with this one. They were watching a movie with friends when Cade, our youngest, said, “You guys missed the best part! You were all looking at your phones.” So Lindsay and Hannah, the high school graduates with superior wisdom in the bunch, collected all of the phones and put them in the other room. The outcome? They said, “It was so much more fun! We were all invested in the movie and sharing inside jokes and building suspense. It was way better without phones.” So it’s a new policy in our house. If you’re going to watch a movie together, then watch a movie together! You should try it.
  4. Little Sibs Rule. There’s nothing like, “Mom, my friends and I want to watch a movie with our younger siblings…Can we?” to warm a mother’s heart and get her to say yes. One of my favorite moments this summer was when my family room was packed with siblings of all ages, all watching a superhero movie together, and cheering together at the end. Movies are a fun way for kids to invest in their younger siblings. Encourage your teen to try it.
  5. Use the remote. Parents, we can’t let the TV do all the talking. Don’t be afraid to stop the movie in the middle and talk about the ideas and morals and worldviews being displayed on a screen. This is one of the best ways to redeem summer movie watching. To do this, of course, you have to be in the room, watching the movie. If you’re as busy as I am, even watching a movie can feel like a sacrifice. But our kids’ hearts are worth the effort.
  6. Play a game first. This was my teenage son’s idea. Before you cave in and let your kids watch another movie, insist that they play a family game first. You’ll be glad you did.  Some of our favorite games are Settlers of Catan, Ticket to Ride, and Monopoly City. Maybe your family would prefer a round of basketball or a game of foosball. Whoever wins the game gets to pick the movie.

Parents, you got this. Be strong. #YOPO: You only parent once.

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