Old Jack is a crusty character who unintentionally mistreats his wife Tessie and their kids. He is bitter against God for his father passing away when he was a kid. It takes something big to get Jack’s attention before it’s too late, but something big indeed happens in Jack’s life.
This story winds up in a very good place, with the redemption of the crotchety old man named Jack. Jack is rude to people and to his own family, and takes his wife Tessie for granted until a tragedy shakes him up. The New York accents are captured very well by the author.
Due to the mature themes, we recommend this manuscript for ages twelve and above. ***NOTES TO THE AUTHOR: This second draft is superior to the first! You made a lot of good changes. We still see that Jack has some serious issues but the language is toned down for a family audience. Rob, there is a “Sweet Jesus” mentioned on page 69 when Jack sees the picture with his father’s face. I didn’t take it as a prayer and this is the only word in the entire script I would suggest you remove there. I think some readers or viewers when it is made into a film will think it is meant as a curse word. But other than that, I think the changes helped tremendously. If you need any suggestions as to where to market it, let us know. Thank you.